This story has a lot of great content -- there is a terrific story in here -- but it suffers from a lack of focus and arrangement.

The meat of the story (the rough, emotional bits) don't come up until we are halfway through the piece. This is a jarring story about how a son continues to love his less-than-admirable father, but so much time is spent getting to the point that we are lost.

I think with some re-editing this piece could really shine. If it lead with the ending line "I never thought my dad would be a crackhead" ... and then lead us through the relationship, I think it would be a more interesting listen.

I do give applause to the voiceover. I can sense real, true emotion here. I don't feel like there is a microphone between him and me -- but the storyteller is talking to me directly. I can feel him crack a smile, hold back tears, and change emotions. It's so real and raw, I just want it to be more focused.

Final note: MUSIC. I would be really wary of licensing this with the copyrighted music found in it. Find someone who can play guitar and just have them jam for you.

Matthew Terrell
Youth Editorial Board
generation.prx.org