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St Patrick's Day - an American Experience
From: Jeffrey Dugan
Length: 00:05:44
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Piece Description
I was once asked to carry the American flag in Baltimore's annual St Patrick's Day parade. It proved to be a moving experience that stayed with me - not only as a Baltimorean of Irish descent - but, maybe for the first time, a small part of the fabric of America. Associated facts: 2006 marks the 50th year of Baltimore's annual St Patrick's Day parade. St Patrick's Day is celebrated on March 17th. Baltimore's 2006 parade is on March 12th. It is the largest parade in Maryland.
Arvid Hokanson
Posted on March 19, 2007 at 10:37 AM | Permalink
Review of St Patrick's Day - an American Experience
Although this piece is a first person essay about a personal topic, I found it to be rather flat. The voicing sounds overly scripted and the piece could use a good edit to tighten it up. If it's to get any carriage in the future, it should be edited down to 3:00 to 3:30 to fit into optional cutaway slots. It would work for a future St. Patrick's Day.
I like the topic and some of the visual imagery in the writing. However, in order to draw in the listeners, Jeffrey needs to put the script down and work on more conversational voicing. The cadence and reading, except for the last 30 seconds, feels too tight. This is especially noticeable when Jeffrey discusses the connection with the police officer and the tear that comes to his eye.
Also, there seems to be an editing error at 2:23 into the piece.
Listeners hear a lot of commentaries on the national magazines, so the bar for writing and voicing is high.