This piece is the perfect example of what I like to call a "bit piece", a short but sweet listening treat.
If the script itself were any longer, it would ruin the integrity of the atmosphere created in this piece.
Being a fan of old-school hip-hop, I was delighted to hear someone finally playing with irregular beats on the air.
The irregular voice tweaks prove compelling, not audibly isolating.
This piece doesn't feel so much of a love story so much as a portrait, of a young man all too aware of his world, his role in it, and the diction on his tongue.

Things to notice: Raymond is the best kind of tweaker, in that he doesn't care so much about unity of tone with his words. As the piece goes on, rhythm becomes more and more consistent. The story Raymond tells grows in structure as the piece goes on, truly fascinating to hear. The cultural references to various Millenial Generation memories intrigues the listener. My only suggestion for Raymond is to please fix some of the awkward lengths of pauses. Some are too long, others far too brief to let the listener pause and reflect.