Transcript for the Piece Audio version of Substitute Teaching (Poem)

SUBSTITUTE TEACHING

Six hours of chaos
Loose cannons in puberty
With Attention Deficit Disorder
Packs of adrenaline coming at you
Like a terrorist offensive

"Canigotothebathroomcanigotomylockercanihaveadrinkofwater
idonthavemybookidonthaveanypaperourteachersaidwecouldplaywithliveammo..."

Was that an explosion
Or did a chair hit the ceiling?

Give them a cartoon
A movie
A video
Nintendo
Rap
SOMETHING
To suck on...

Who needs capital punishment?
Sentence the condemned
To some god-awful middle school
In the eternal seventh grade
Where sugar-buzzed gnomes
Dive bomb off the wall

Hell,
A prisoner would beg to be injected
Electrocuted
Gassed
Shot
Hanged
Guillotined
Even fed to wild piranha
Than endure THIS place
Where no one listens
Or brings their pencil
And heckles you like a circus mutant...

All the money spent on therapy
Spirituality
Holistic massage
Chakra alignment
Ethical treatment to rabid wolverines
GONE!!!

Wiped from the consciousness
By the primal rage
Triggered by twelve-year-old sociopaths