I learned from a recent New Yorker profile of a New Jersey barber that barbering will soon be a thing of the past – you know, the red and white striped barber’s pole, the electric razor, the phlegmatic man in white.

It’s hard to find a barber shop these days. Salons, yes, stylists, yes, beauty parlors, you bet, but a neighborhood joint where people hang out, read the paper, and watch the locks pile up on the floor…

Those days, despite the success of BARBERSHOP and BARBERSHOP 2, and the transformation of Ice Cube from gangsta thug to bankable family fare movie star, are gone. Where are the Allman Brothers fans going to go to maintain their mullets? Where are the guidos and fancy boys going to get their DAs, their fades, their buzz cuts, and flat tops with a fender?

And shoe shines. Remember shoe shines? Well, to be frank, I’ve never had my shoes shined in my life, I do it...
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